It was the summer of 1989 when I asked my Grand Ma Ma to drive me to the beach. We would always take drives to the beach but this time I asked her if I could spend the day by myself and have her pick me up at dusk. Her answer “ OK Darlin”. I met my first lover that day. I was walking along the shore line and saw a man around 25 lying on the beach. He had on a very small bathing suit and what I craved so very much was outlined perfectly. That feeling again. I keep walking back and forth in front of him and finally he stood up and came to the water’s edge. I could hardly keep my control. He said “ Hi…My name is Tino..What’s Yours?” I had to struggle to even say my name “Thom”! Tino invited me into his beautiful beach home and I was thrilled. It was only a little while before we were in the bedroom. It was several hours before I would leave that room. Several wonderful hours. Needless to say I would ask Grand Ma Ma to take me to the beach every weekend after that. Soon I got my drivers license and was able to take myself. Tino photographed us having sex. I still remember the excitement and pleasure I received from having these pictures taken. He would set up the camera and then put it on a timer and we would pose for the shot in various sexual positions. I always new I was going to be a star. This was as close as I ever came. I can’t remember why and how our relationship came to an end. I suppose it ended when I went off to college. It would be years before I would see Tino again. I was back home on vacation and I went to the only Gay Bar around. Almost as soon as I walked into the bar I saw Tino. He hadn’t changed at all. He was still very handsome and once again that part of me , the part that controlled me, wanted him. As I walked towards him it seemed to me that he remembered who I was. It didn’t take long to realize that the difference between 16 and 26 is one part of your life when your looks change a lot. I now know that there are many other times during our lives that our looks change A LOT. My first question to him was “Do you still have the photo’s of us having sex?”. He seemed a little stunned at first so I told him who I was and soon we were back to his house once again, although not the beach house. The feelings of seeing those photo’s once again are indescribable. I was so young. I was so naïve. I was so molested. At least, that is what it would be called in today’s world. Only a world filled with Hate and Evil could decribe the love I had received from this man as wrong.
I was in love at 16 and I could feel the love in return. How can that be evil? It will never be my definition of EVIL. We spent that night and the next night together in each others arms and inside each others bodies and this time not the Evil Priest who do Molest nor The hypocritical Bible Toaters could tell me I was being molested. I loved Tino and even though I have never seen him again I will always love him for loving me –at 16 and 26….